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Geezer Wisdom
Courtesy of P.F.
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When I was born, I was given a choice: A big dick or a good memory...
I don't remember what I chose.
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Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.
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A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects.
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Impotence: Nature's way of saying: 'No hard feelings....'
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There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men:
'don't' and 'stop', unless they are used together.
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Panties: Not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on earth.
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There are three stages of sex in a man's life: Tri Weekly, Try Weekly, and Try Weakly.
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Virginity can be cured.
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Virginity is not dignity, its lack of opportunity.
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Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
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I tried phone sex once, but the holes in the dialer were too small...
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Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.
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Q: What's an Australian kiss?
A: The same thing as a French kiss, only down under.
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A couple just married was happy with the whole thing.
He was happy with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing......
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Q: What are the three biggest tragedies in a man's life?
A: Life sucks, job sucks, and the wife don't.
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Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Breasts don't have eyes.
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Despite the old saying: 'Don't take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with their wives!
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Q: Did you know bj’s can be replaced?
A: yea, with a wedding band!!!
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