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Stories/Jokes: Off-Color Humor

Two Old Men


Two old men, Moe and Joe, decide they're close to their last days and decide to have a last night on the town. After a few drinks, they end up at the local brothel.

The madam takes on look at the two old geezers and whispers to her manager, "Go up to the first two bedrooms and put an inflated doll in each bed. These two are so old and drunk I'm not wasting two of my girls on them. They won't know the difference."

The manager does as he's told and the two old men go upstairs and take care of their business.

As they are walking home, Moe says, "You know, I think my girl was dead."

"Dead?!" says Joe. "Why do you say that?"

"Well, she never moved or made a sound all the time I was loving her," says Moe.

Joe says, "Could be worse. I think mine was a witch!"

"A witch?!" exclaimed Moe. "Why would you say that?"

"Well, I was making love to her, kissing her on the neck, and then I went down and gave her a little bite on the butt. Next thing I knew, she farted and flew out the window!"

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