Childrens' Tales of the Sea

This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles.
(Kelly age 6)

Oysters' balls are called pearls.
(James age 6)

If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea all round you, you are in continent.
(Wayne age 7)

I think sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson. She's not my friend no more.
(Kylie age 6)

A dolphin breathes through an asshole on the top of its head.
(Billy age 8)

My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs.
(Millie age 6)

When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans.
(William age 7)

I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How do mermaids get pregnant?
(Helen age 6)

Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you a hock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves into chargers.
(Christopher age 7)

My Mom has fishnets, but doesn't catch any fish.
(Laura age 5)

When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small.
(Kevin age 6)

When me and Sarah went to the sea side in the summer holidays, we hid in the sand dunes and watched my big sister doing it with her boy friend. It was fun.
(Lauren age 7)

A submarine goes under the water like a fish, but it has lots of seamen inside.
(Emma age 5)

When I grow up, I want to be captain of a big ship, and have lots of sailors.
(Valerie age 6)

Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Two divers can't go down alone, so they have to go down on each other.
(Becky age 8)

One holiday my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was going very fast. She says she won't do it again because water shot up her fanny.
(Julie age 7)